What's Sabotaging your Weight Loss with Jennifer Powter
April 13, 2022 - Episode #94 - What's Sabotaging your Weight Loss with Jennifer Powter
You can’t change what you aren’t aware of. This is a powerful statement from today’s guest, weight loss coach Jennifer Powter. We are diving into the hot topic of weight loss. Do you have a tendency to sabotage your weight loss efforts? Are you just depending on willpower to help you lose weight? Ready for something more effective? Our expert today is Jennifer Powter. She is a weight loss and mindset expert, a best-selling author and keynote speaker. She calls herself a diet disruptor, which I love! And she helps women break free from the vicious cycle of yo-yo dieting so they can lose weight for good. Find out more at www.jenniferpowter.com This eye-opening episode will help you identify what you are doing that sabotages your weight loss efforts….is it mindset? Emotional eating? We are tackling this head on and helping you drop the guilt and shame, overcome burnout and develop emotional resilience. Get ready to be inspired my friend. It’s all today on the Healthy Harmony podcast. I told you that I would feature your reviews for the Healthy Harmony podcast. This one is from Preschool Princess and is titled Both Informative and Encouraging. She writes…..”Jennifer is awesome at sharing relevant information as well as practical tips. I end every episode feeling like I can do something rather than feeling guilty that I haven’t done something”. This review means a lot because a podcast does take a lot of work and the reason that I launched a podcast is because I wanted to help deliver simple health information that is easy to understand and I want you to feel like I can do this! I just absolutely LOVE it when you feel empowered instead of burdened by guilt and shame. Because I’m going to keep reminding you friend, you can do this! So, two action items…… #1 Leave a rating and review. Let me hear from you. What do you like? How is this helping you? What do you want to hear more of? Leaving a rating and review and clicking that subscribe button increases the visibility of the podcast. And that enables me to bring awesome guests to you! #2 If you are feeling overwhelmed and need some support on your health journey. I offer a one-hour virtual health coaching session so check that out at inspirehealthyharmony.com. And a little secret, if you book a 15 min discovery call, I’ll give you a promo code for your one-hour visit. Read Full Transcript below Where else to listen: (note: Google is only available on android devices)
FULL TRANSCRIPT April 13, 2022 - Episode #94 - What's Sabotaging your Weight Loss with Jennifer Powter Speaker 1: You can't change what you aren't aware of. This is a powerful statement from today's guest weight loss, coach, Jennifer Powter. We are diving in to the hot topic of weight loss. Do you have a tendency to sabotage your weight loss efforts? Are you just depending on willpower to help you lose weight? ready for something more effective? Today's podcast is just for you. This episode will help you identify what you are doing, that sabotages your weight loss efforts. Is it mindset, emotional eating? We are tackling this head on in helping you drop the guilt and shame, overcome burnout and develop emotional resilience. Get ready to be inspired my friend it's all today on the Healthy Harmony podcast. Welcome. This is the Healthy Harmony podcast. I'm Jennifer Pickett Dietitian turned functional medicine health coach. I help spiraling moms overcome the overwhelm through functional wellness coaching for the body, mind, and soul so they can transform their health and live a deeply fulfilled life of freedom and harmony. Okay, let's get real. When it comes to your health, you know what to do. I help you make this shift from knowing to actually doing the last 25 years of experience have taught me that the absolute last thing a woman needs is a lecture about self-care and another unrealistic diet plan. I recognize the importance of compassionate and intentional health practices. So you can feel good because guess what? When you feel good, you are more likely to make better decisions for your health. If you're ready to take control of your complete health, address the standing in your way and live a life of freedom and harmony, my friend, you're in the right place. I told you that I would feature your reviews for the healthy harmony podcast. This one is from preschool princess and is titled both informative and encouraged. She writes, Jennifer is awesome at sharing relevant information, as well as practical tips. I end every episode feeling like I can do something rather than feeling guilty that I haven't done something. You know, this review means so much because yeah, this podcast takes a lot of work. And the reason that I launched this podcast is because I wanted to help deliver simple health information. That is easy to understand. And I want you to feel like, Hey, I can do this. So I absolutely love it. When you feel empowered, instead of feeling burdened by guilt and shame, because I'm gonna keep reminding you my friend, you can do this. Okay. So two action items. Number one, leave a rating and a review. Let me hear from you. What do you like, how is this helping you? What want to hear more of leave a rating in a review and clicking that subscribe button. It increases the visibility of this podcast. And that enables me to bring more awesome guests to you. Number two, if you are feeling overwhelmed and you need some support on your health journey, I do offer those one hour virtual health coaching sessions. So be sure to check that [email protected] and just a little secret, a little tidbit. If you book a discovery, call with me a 15 minute discovery call, I'm gonna give you a promo code for that one hour visit. So just a little secret there between us now, let's get started and I'll tell you about today's guest, Jennifer Powter. She is a weight loss and mindset expert, a best selling author and keynote speaker. She calls herself a diet disruptor, which I love. She helps women break free from the vicious cycle of yo-yo dieting. They can lose weight for good. Welcome Jennifer Powter. It's another day in another hot topic. Guess what? We're talking, weight loss. And I have a health coach here with us. Her name is Jen Powter, and I am so glad that you're here, Jen, this is a good topic. Speaker 2: Oh my gosh. Thank you for having me. I'm excited to talk about this. Speaker 1: How are you today? Speaker 2: Really great. Really, really great. I'm so thrilled to be with you and your listeners. Speaker 1: Thank you. Thank you. Well, you know, looking at your history and I see that you are a remarkable weight loss coach, but you're not just a coach. This has, this is a passion of yours because of a very particular struggle that you had. So first and foremost, I wanna hear about that struggle. Speaker 2: Yeah. Thank you. You know, I think that I just wanna take your listeners back for me 10 years ago when I had numerous degrees and certifications in this area of health and wellbeing. And I was 40 pounds overweight. I found myself as this rundown, tired, stressed out people, pleasing woman, wife, mom, all of it, you name it. And I knew all of the things and yet remained so frustrated that I couldn't seem to lose that weight. And it really, he did spark obviously, well, for me, it's like now a lifelong passion <laugh> because I thought, oh my gosh, if this is happening to me, you know, how do people without all of my credentials and education feel, you know? And it was so frustrating for me. I just yeah, I had to do a big deep dive back into the research and really yeah, really understand what I was up against, which was more than just the food. And I think that's the thing that I really want to talk about is it's more than just what we put in our bodies. You know, Speaker 1: It's so much more than that. I say that so often it, it, this was as simple as a list of things to eat and a list of things to avoid. Well, we'd all be pretty, you know, fit and trim, but it's so much more than that. So, so what is it, what did you discover? Speaker 2: You know, so took it for me, was knowing why I was doing what I was doing with the food and quite frankly, with wine the emotional eating component connection that so many of us have to food can really be subconscious. Like we don't even know we're doing it, or we don't identify. I mean, I did not identify as an emotional eat eater. And I totally was. So I think that we've got a misperception of how we're using food and booze in our culture, in this society. And so often it becomes the quickest cure for boredom or sadness or distraction, or just wanting to check out or give ourselves a treat or a sense of indulging. And that's just actually, you know, you, you just can't live like that and lose weight at the same time. It they're in conflict with each other. There's Speaker 1: So right. And I think, I, I think, I just feel all of our listeners leaning in because you, I think out of what you said, we can all relate to that. We are trying to numb the pain. I mean, either we feel like we deserve a treat or we're so stressed and we just need a break and we're looking for something to just help us kind of check out and it's devastating to our overall health. So I'm curious, you know, with that emotional eating component what is the, what is the first step in, in really kinda coming about that? What is our first step in, in identifying emotional, eating and changing that behavior? Speaker 2: You know, one of the very first things that I did was I, and it sounds like miserable to do, but it was so powerful was I literally just wrote down when I was, I wrote down everything I ate in a day and then I wrote it down. I wrote down what was going on for me, how I felt on a scale of one to 10, if I was hungry. And I just got curious with my, and it, you know, it sounds maybe it, maybe it doesn't sound dumb, but I was so desperate to figure out, okay, what is up. But anytime I basically had so many times throughout the day when I was eating for non physiological hunger reasons, and I didn't know how to create my awareness around that. And you can't change what you're not aware of. So that for me was my very first step. And it was really, really eye-opening. My witching hours were between sort of seven 30 and 10 30 at night. When the kids had gone to bed, I was tired. I was bored. I, I, I didn't feel like doing what I was doing. I, I wanted, you know, and I just, all of a sudden I was able to see things through a different perspective. And that's what created that gateway opening for me. Speaker 1: So very powerful. I love how you use that term curious, just curiosity with just being curious about yourself and you really just refer to mindfulness. We have to become very, very self-aware and of our tendencies, like you even identified, Hey, this is the time of night when I'm getting off the rails here, what's going on with me. And I think all of us moms can relate to that. We just feel like, Hey, this is my time, and I'm gonna enjoy this, but we're are really sabotaging our weight loss efforts. So I've heard you refer to this term called emotional resilience. So what is that? And how can we become emotionally resilient? Speaker 2: Oh gosh, this is a good question. I think we might need to stay on all day. You know, <laugh> what it is. So it's the ability that one has to adapt to the stressful situations or circumstances or those acutely you know, those crisis moments in our life without having it without, without having it re crazy personal havoc. So, you know, a lot of us have hard things going on. And I, I personally think that's life, you know, I've met my age now. I realize that there's never gonna be a time where there aren't gonna be curve balls throwing at me. That's just what it means to be human. But if you let those curve balls or those stressful situations, be the thing that derails you from your best self, your highest potential, well, then you're living with less resilience and you have such a harder or a more difficult time really handling the stress that comes with being alive and being human and all of the things that we're creating in our lives, marriages, to kids jobs. I mean, so much of the things that we want also have a certain amount of stress to them. And food is not the answer to a lack of emotional resilience. It just actually creates more shame and pain. Speaker 1: Yes. And I'm so, so that was my next question. I'm glad you brought up shame and pain and looking at your story and how, I mean, you were at a place where you had gained a lot of weight. How does guilt and shame hold you back in your health journey? Speaker 2: Shame is, you know, Brene Brown did such great work and helping us understand shame. And it was like, there's something wrong with me. I am broken. I like there was a deep internalization of my weight loss struggles and this humiliation and embarrassment that also accompanied it, like, how could this happen to me? Why me, like, I don't understand. And, and, you know, I had to rise above those low level emotions because they're really unproductive, Jen. Like, you need to go there, but you can't stay there. You cannot live in that place and expect to be able to lead yourself to health or to happiness or to a fulfilling life. And I think the, the hook or the, the CRI thing there is we have to move from self criticism and we talked about it already, but to really that self curiosity, we need to create a shift in our way of being from it, being punitive, to being our own ally cheerleader, and most encouraging force. And I think for so many, I deal with women, you know, so many of us don't know how to be that to ourselves. We'll be that to our friends, to our partners, to our children, but then we get hooked into perfectionism or that we're not never allowed to fail that we're somehow less than, and there's this weird, self-worth worthiness thing that creeps in there too. Speaker 1: There is. And, and I'm like you as a coach, I see this every single day with women, just that guilt and shame of I've tried these things and it's not working. And, and I, you know, I, it, it must just be me. And I think women feel alone in their struggles. They feel like everyone else is doing just fine. And they don't realize that so many of us struggle with, and when we're mired down in that guilt and that shame, like you said, it's such low level emotion that we really cannot move forward. So we have to move from that self-loathing to that self curiosity. Okay. What do I need to tweak? What do I need to do differently? How can I become more emotionally resilient? So I just, I love this discussion. So, and this really kind of plays into our overall mindset. So what role does mindset play if you are trying to lose weight? Speaker 2: It's I think it's like, you know how people say it's 80, 20, you know, I'm like it's 99% mindset. <Laugh> it's 99 mindset. Yeah. And I that's, I think that's why diets are, you know, create such dismal results for women. Is it focuses on a tactic, not the inner work that needs to accompany or be the primary focus of a weight loss journey. And so mindset it's critical. And I think a lot of times, you know, in coaching, we throw that word around a lot. And there's a book that really helped me. And it was basically like how to switch from being in a judger mindset to a learning mindset. And it was so good. It was like, you know, change your questions, change your life. I think was the name of the book. And it was about, can I ask myself better questions so I can come up with better solutions? So a, a low level question or a question that's never gonna get you anywhere is what's wrong with me? How come this is so easy for anybody else? You know, obviously this is, you know, what's my it's like when you personalize it, right. There's never, you're never gonna get a good answer. Right. Whereas if you're to ask yourself, what's one thing I could do a little bit differently. What's one thing that I'm gonna become willing to see that I haven't been willing to see before it's up leveling our level of curiosity and questioning about ourselves so we can get passionate, curious, as opposed to that critical voice in our head. That really just does it really does. It wants us to stay stuck and play small and to not shine our light, which is trust me as somebody who was overweight wearing, you know, with one pair of fat pants in my closet, no, I had no light to shine. I was not in a good mindset or physiological or physically healthy space. Speaker 1: I know that most people are probably wondering, so I'm gonna ask this question. How long did that shift take you? I know the question is always, how, how fast can I get the weight off, but for you, this journey was very, very specific to your mindset becoming emotionally resilient. So what did that process look like for you from a time perspective? Speaker 2: Oh, that's a great question. I might give you a different answer than you'd expect here. Okay. I indulged engaged, got hooked and addicted to the struggle for about a year, two years, three years, I guess, two years or so. Okay. So I just was critical of judgemental, no compassion, curiosity. I did everything in that. You know, I focused on the food, the being quote unquote good during a certain period of the day. And then I was really quote bad at night or on the weekends telling myself I deserved it. So I was in that place for quite a while. And this is where I see my clients too. They will tolerate their own struggle and misery for, but that, that that's gonna be how, that's the critical part? How long do you wanna live like that? For me after a few years of that, there, it basically took me one day to make the mindset shift, to get really responsible for myself, my life, my health, my wellbeing what I put in my mouth, my emotion, how I was willing to experience them process and feel them. And then the weight loss was smooth sailing after that, but the mindset switch came first. And then I could lean in to the behavioral aspects. That of course were required for me to lose that weight. 40 pounds is significant. And it really, for me, that happened in about eight months. Okay. So I gave myself time. I wasn't trying to diet or restrict or deprive myself to thinness that doesn't work. I just had to simply stop putting the garbage in my mouth after 8:00 PM was my bandaid solution for my emotional soothing. Speaker 1: Oh my goodness. So many powerful words there. And so many things that we can relate to. And I would, I would say it's probably why you're so effective as a coach because you went through that struggle. You did it all wrong for over a year. And it's, you know, I mean, so how often do we learn from, okay, I did it this way and this doesn't work. I mean, how many people come to us being on every single diet imaginable you and I both know, 95% of diets fail, then we have to shift and go, okay. Something has to be different. So let's talk about willpower along these same lines with mindset. Why is willpower just not enough? I mean, I think we're, we're depending on that sheer willpower to resist certain foods, why is that not enough? Speaker 2: That's great question. I think willpower quote unquote, and, you know, slash dis the plan. Exactly. Because those are, you know, if you were to imagine, or just everybody, you know, whoever's listening, put your arm out and hold it out. You know, your muscles are being used. It feels easy in the beginning to just keep your arm straight out extended from your body. But eventually that muscle will fail. It has to, it's not meant to live in that position forever. It's the exact same thing with willpower and discipline. They are, they are psychological muscles or constructs that diminish over time. And we think it's what we need, but that's actually wrong thinking the minute that because all of us are still craving the emotional reward, Jen, like all of us are still the feeling of relief, the feeling of indulgence, the feeling we still want to be able to somehow distract. We wanna not be bored. We want entertainment. And so if we just use willpower and say, okay, I'm not gonna have the chips, wine, cookies, cheese crackers, this, that, and the other. Well, then we also don't get the reward. So we have to learn how to meet our own wants and needs in a different way, a non-food based way, because that was never food's job in the first place. Speaker 1: You're so right. Cuz food has a very specific purpose and we're using it for we're using it to deal with our emotions. You talk a lot about, about burnout about mental and emotional burnout that a lot of women face. So let's talk about burnout a little bit. Speaker 2: Yeah. Great. Great. Thank you. I'd love to I think I've had some experience with this too. <Laugh> burnout is an outcome and it's the come of being last on your priority list. It's the outcome of pretending you're fine when you're not, it's the outcome of running the candles at both ends. It's the outcome of being a people pleaser of giving up your own needs and wants and desires because either a, you don't think you deserve or are worthy of having them met or you were taught to never actually have them in the first place. And so I think women spend a lot of years giving to others, pouring into others, pouring into their career, their family, their kids. And it's like for me anyways, this slow, but really steady decline off of my own, you know, from my own self care, like somehow if I took care of myself, it was being selfish. Cause I was taking away from my career, my kids, my work, my husband, and what I teach now is the golden goose philosophy, which is as a, as a woman, you are the golden go. If you have kids, a partner, clients, you serve a career that you love. Everyone's living off your golden eggs. If something happens to you, there are no more golden eggs, Speaker 1: Right? We Speaker 2: Have to take care. And when you do that first and foremost everything else does get easier. And I think the problem is, is you don't know that until you experience it. And we have to change in order to experience that and change in itself is scary. Cuz we're going from the familiar to the unfamiliar. It was very unfamiliar to me to give myself permission for time to eat, like time to eat or to take a break or to say no to my family. And yes, to myself first I had work through those initial critical thoughts of, oh, this is, you know, a good mom wouldn't do this. If I was a good mom, I would do this, this and this. And none of that was true, but oh my goodness. I had to really look at my thoughts, Speaker 1: Man. It's so, so much there. I mean, when you started going through that initial list of putting yourself last and burning the candle at both ends, I just wanted to go check, check, check. You know, I can relate to all of that because we're just, we don't wanna give ourselves permission. So as I'm coaching women and, and you know, and I, I give them, I'm asking them, Hey, you need to take a break. You need to find some, some downtime. Even if it's short to just relax, your body desperately needs that we feel like we, we feel guilty for doing that. Mm-Hmm <affirmative> so it's just, it's incredible how this can be a little bit more complicated with women because there's just a lot of guilt there. We feel like we need to take care of everybody else first, but it doesn't work. It never ever works. It comes back to bite us. Okay, Jen. So that leads me to our next question. We've really dived into the, the mental and the emotional aspects. How else are we sabotaging our weight loss efforts? Speaker 2: You know, the thing that I have found over and over again is that women they quit before they let themselves be successful. And, and I think it's because, you know, we're bombarded with literally I was at my grocery store last night and there's just this bombardment of misinformation about waste loss, like weight loss results. And it's like lose 14 pounds in 14 days or the 30 pound fix in a month or, and so you start to think, well, that must be how fast I should lose weight. And when you don't lose that quickly, you start to view yourself as a failure when really nothing could be further from the truth. So I think that for every woman, you need to really lean in to what healthy fat loss looks like, what it really is, and then set your expectations, adjust your expectations, let yourself practice, you know, feeling your feelings, eating in a way where you're nourishing body and stay consistent. I think, you know, that is the biggest thing is you quit before you're successful. You don't give yourself enough time to lose the weight. And quite frankly, in my world, I think you're killing it. If you're losing anywhere around five pounds a month, you should feel so proud of that. That's five pounds that are not gonna come back. Like Speaker 1: Yes, yeah. Speaker 2: Diets make you think. Or, or if you go keto or PA you know, any of those things where you have that massive drop in water weight that shows on the skin and you see eight pounds, nine pounds lost in two weeks, you're like so jazzed about it. And then those results diminish over time because of course the body water weight has shed you. Now you're back down to healthy well real weight loss. And so it's very confusing for women. Speaker 1: It really is. And there's so much information out there. And again, we really get wrapped up into comparison and we're really, we're drawn to these kind of quick fix claims because deep down inside we do, we want the quick fix mm-hmm <affirmative> and it doesn't work like that. If we wanna lose weight and keep it off, if we want it to be sustainable weight loss, we've got to be consistent and it cannot be something funky. Exactly. you know, there's just so many funky things out there. And we have to also understand that this is a huge industry, this diet, weight loss industry that makes a lot of money. Mm-Hmm <affirmative>, they don't really care about your health, your weight loss, your mindset, your mental stability your emotional security. They just care about the money and they make more money when you fail. Speaker 1: So I, you know, always like to kinda remind people of that, because that draw is so strong of, let me go to this quick fix. And so women, I really feel like have, have messed up their metabolism by by just gravitating to these quick fixes and what you is so powerful is that we've got to stay consistent, lean into what healthy weight loss looks like. And I think it kind of really plays into that momentum. You know, how can we just kinda get the ball moving in the right direction and feel proud of the efforts that you're taking. So you have like a theory called the fine theory at Y E so tell me more about that theory. I'm curious. Speaker 2: All right. Well, I will, I will not offend anybody by actually swearing. So use your imagination here, but what I have found, and I found this in my own life, I heard it this morning actually is when you ask somebody a woman, how she's doing a lot of times you get this quick answer. Oh, oh good. Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine. And even my good friend, who's going through a divorce right now, nasty gut wrenching divorce. When I talked to her, I'm like, Hey, you know, how are you? She's like, oh, I'm fine. And fine. To me. Stands for F up inside. Nice exterior Speaker 1: Where? Oh, <laugh> yes, yes. Speaker 2: <Laugh> Speaker 1: Say that one more time. Let's let's say it again for the people in the back, Speaker 2: The people in the background. Yeah. It's effed up inside. Nice exterior. So we're so afraid for our pain, our, the, our emotional self to be revealed because where we worried that it'll be too much, that we're gonna become unlovable or that someone's not gonna of like those aspects of ourself. And so we go, yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine. And I call it wearing this mask of fine, where life is falling apart. You're completely shattered on the inside. And then you go to pretense, saving face and basically lying to others, kind lying to yourself. Cuz when you say that, you're totally not and honest with what is true for you. And it leads to all sorts of self neglect, self abandonment, lack of self care, cuz self sabotage doesn't just happen in isolation. Right? It's like all of these other aspects are all intertwined and we just go, yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine. You know, you can be exotic and you're, you know, going through the worst of the worst things, but the quick I'm fine. Speaker 1: I'm fine. It's just habit. It is automatic. Speaker 2: Yeah. And so whenever I hear it now I go, oh really? <Laugh> I'm like, oh tell, tell me more. <Laugh> yeah, because it's never the truth. Speaker 1: Yes. I have a wonderful holistic chiropractor that I go. And she asked me that question, how is everything going? And I said, I'm fine. And she said, she looked at me and she said, are you really? Yeah. And I was like, no, I'm not. So it was so refreshing for someone to say, are you really, because it is, it is such a habit to say I'm fine. It, we all, we, we are wearing a mask and, and as part of my story is just, it is absolutely exhausting and it is devastating to our health to keep wearing this mask and acting like everything is just fun. So I love your, I love your fine theory. I think that's pretty awesome. Speaker 2: <Laugh> thank you. Well, yeah, I mean what I say to people when they ask me that question, I say, do you want a plight typical answer? Or do you want the truth? <Laugh> and it's off putting for some people. They they're like some people say the plight answer, cause they're just simply asking the question as a formality, not actually cuz they really care. So yeah. You know, there's that in our society right now too, Speaker 1: Most definitely this is been such a powerful podcast. I, I love your approach and I feel like it's going to be just so empowering for our listeners to kinda shed light on these aspects that can really sabotage not just your weight loss efforts, but most importantly, your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health. So thank you so much. I, this has been absolutely amazing. So before we wrap up, give our listeners just an additional word of encouragement. Speaker 2: What I want everybody listening to is to really get, it's never too late. You're never too old. Like it's never too late to change your health. And it does not matter how many quote unquote failures you've experienced in the past. All that means is that method just didn't work for you. So don't bang your head against a brick wall and keep trying it take a different approach. Stay hopeful. There is a solution. Speaker 1: I love it. I love it. Now I know our listeners will wanna connect with you. So give us some information on where they can find you and connect with you. Speaker 2: The best place right now is I'm having a lot of fun. We have I've got a a Facebook group called diet disruption movement. And it's really because that's what I'm taking a stand for. I wanna disrupt this dieting industry and teach women another way to approach weight loss so that it's permanent. So that's a great place to come and find me. Of course, my website, Jennifer powter.com. Speaker 1: Yes. And I will make sure we have the links to both of those in this show notes so that people can easily access those Jen. This has been absolutely fantastic. I really appreciate you joining me today. Speaker 2: Oh, thank you. Thank you so much for having your podcast and, and well just sharing people's stories. It's so important. Speaker 1: So important. Thank you. That's some powerful stuff, right? It's incredible how we sabotage our own efforts to get healthy and lose weight. I hope, hope today's podcast inspired you. Turning your health around can certainly seem daunting and overwhelming. And I want you to know that you're not alone until next time. I'm wishing you health and happiness bye y'all. |